Covid Poly: Airplane mode

 

Polyamory is not always the easiest of activities.  It's a world riff with tripping points and surprise new emotional quandaries. 

Sprinkle a year of COVID isolation on top, and we create a landmine filled landscape just waiting for an unwary wanderer.

Enter me and my big old foot. Allow me to set the scene... 

My metamor "X", is a great guy with a good heart. Covid has been rough, and as someone who is somewhat routine focused... the inability to do all the things he normally has on calendar has taken a toll.  (Acknowledging that it's taken a toll on everyone, in different ways). 

It culminated this past month, where X reached a point where he needed a change...  So he set up a flight across the country to spend time with family in a sunny location.   My partner "Y" had some hard decisions to make, about how to cohabitate with him when he returns from being in an airplane for hours on end. Y also started a discussion with me on what my comfort level was.. 

So..  the stage is set, the players cast, and the disease shadowed theater ready....   and now the ambush. 

Personally, I was not comfortable with the situation, and the potential exposure.. so I cancelled my weekly date night with Y for the week...  only to realize it would be a week until we get a chance to see each other again...

Enter ninja feelings, stage right.  

This rekindled the hard feelings of being the Third in a relationship. To know that the default/cohabitation situation of marriage.. combined with my metamor not being out with their family...  means that anytime that family visits.. I have a price to pay for it in time with my Partner.. and the feeling of being stuffed in a box and put on the shelf until convenient. 

So now, I am processing these hard feels... and doing it in the isolation of COVID.  The laughs never end in this greek tragedy